Wednesday, March 08, 2006


I LOVE this movie. My daughter and I have watched this 7 times. (We have also watched the A&E version several times and read the book 3 times. ) It is the most romantic story, funny and moving.

So, it didn't surprise me when on my way home from work yesterday, one of the lines from the movie popped into my head. In the movie Mr. Darcy declared, "My good opinion, once lost forever." God whispered, "That's you. You are like that." I was startled. That IS me. I AM exactly like that. I could have coined that line. Why hadn't I ever seen that before?

I was really stunned. I realized that if I decide you are unsafe, crazy, too difficult, inferior to me, have wronged or hurt me, or I just don't care for you....I turn off a switch. I am done. You may never know it. I may smile and be polite. But I have totally turned off my heart and mind to you. I have little or no compassion. I rarely think about you and if I am somehow forced to, I am detached and self-righteous. Yikes....I am Proud, Intolerant, Arrogant, and Unforgiving!

The conversation I had been having with God before this happened was about love. He asked me, "Who do you love?" I was happily flipping through all the great people I have in my life, when He confronted me with faces that I decided weren't worthy of my time or attention.

He doesn't treat me like that. Those faces I had rejected belong to His people, ones He loves and died for. Ones who are worthy of His love.

I am ashamed. I am committed to change.

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