Yesterday I took my girl to her PLR Bible study. Since she doesn't have a driver's license yet, and they meet 45 minutes from home, I took a stack of work to do while I waited for her. The next thing I knew, my table was surrounded by the Bible study group. They were young. Around 30 years younger than me. But we had such a great time. Talking about life. Talking about how to follow You with pure hearts. We laughed at each others' jokes. Had some serious moments too, before I sent them all back to their table for their Bible study. They wanted to stay and study with me...what an honor. But I really wanted to give my daughter her space.
So in the middle of the night, You reminded me that I want to be current and fluid and open. Last night was just a practice run. You said that we really are going to take this journey together. The picture I have in my mind is that of being on the first ascent of a giant roller coaster. How the cars strain against gravity. The wheels squeak. The going is slow...up, up, and higher still. My eyes are closed and I am white knuckled. We are just about to hit that pause...that sensation of being almost ready to go over the top and the gut wrenching feeling you know will hit when we go flying down the other side. I can sense You in the car next to me.
Lord, I don't know if I will bravely throw my hands up in the air and relish the ride down; perhaps I will grab You and hide my head in Your arms to muffle my terror; maybe I will laugh and scream with the thrill. This is a new ride, never been on it before, so I have no clue how fast we will go or how many dips and turns there will be. All I know is, we are at the top and I feel You saying, "Hold on....here we goooooooooooooooooooo...."
I have two questions for You:
1)Will I like the ride? I know, I know....wait and see.
2)I don't like heights. I like safety. I am not a risk taker. How did You EVER convince me to take this ride?? Quit laughing!
Delight yourself in the Lord; & He will give you the desires of your heart.--Psalm 37:4