HUNGRY

I am hungry.

Not for food. Nor for fellowship. But for more of Jesus.

I am hungry to see lives changed and transformed.
To see hearts broken with repentance and then broken with the realization that they have been rescued and redeemed.
To look into eyes that have been dead and to see the spark of the Holy God awakening them.
To rejoice, and dance, and sing, and clap, and cry, and dance, and sing some more with those in their first moments of realization that they once were dead but now are alive!
To bend my knee alongside a soul that is aware of the presence of a Creator, so mighty, so holy, so loving...that it takes one's breath away.

I am hungry to be out of my pew.
To hold a hand that is gnarled and bruised with the hardships of life.
To kiss away tears of devastation.
To walk side by side the lame and forgotten.
To be silly with children when adults are too busy for play.
To wash feet laden with miles, and dirt, and pain.
To soothe those in need of soothing.

I am hungry.
And I am afraid.
Not because of what it will cost me because I know the cost will be great.
You modeled that already.
I am afraid that You will present me with the opportunities and I will be too busy, too self-absorbed, too comfortable, too unloving, too uncaring, and most of all...too apathetic.
I am afraid that I may say no to You.

I am hungry.
And I am afraid.
I am afraid that a day will come when I will no longer feel this hunger.

I am hungry.
Jesus, keep me hungry.